The last week has been like a kind of digital balancing act for many gamers, wherein wherein the goal is to find time for GTA IV, Mario Kart Wii, and the new TF2 patch while a crowd oohs and ahhs far below. In some sense I am lucky to have A.D.D., which has actually allowed me to pull this off to some degree. What was once an education-hindering mental illness has now manifested into the ultimate multi-tasking ability, rendering me uniquely suited for life in this century. But I digress.

GTA IV is, obviously, quite good. Even when reviewers are pointing out flaws or aspects of the game they don’t like it’s in between gushing torrents of high praise, and so I think the question of quality has been laid to rest. Whatever your feelings towards such an all-encompassing crime simulation, it’s clear that they have succeeded in creating a very authentic and complete world, and that’s no mean feat. The level of detail still leaves me feeling a bit incredulous. Just how many hours of TV are there on the TV in Niko’s apartment, and how much time went into creating it all? Man may never be meant to know.

I’ve dabbled a little bit in the multiplayer and enjoyed what I’ve seen so far, though I’ve been lucky to avoid any of the networking issues that seem to be plaguing everyone else. Cops and Crooks is ridiculously fun when executed properly, which is to say that it’s either a beautiful, heart-pumping run through the city or the biggest waste of time you can imagine. The catalyst, per usual, is teamwork, and it’s simple luck of the draw that determines whether you’re stuck with a solid team or drooling team-killing idiots. I have almost — ALMOST — been persuaded to open up my Xbox privacy settings to let me chat with the world at large, but I still fear the unwashed masses.

There is of course the omnipresent issue of whether or not this title will obliterate our society’s last remaining shred of morality, heralding a world in which kids will stop killing cops only long enough to murder a hooker. Recent conversational flare-ups notwithstanding, I consider this to be a dead issue as there’s nothing really new to say, and the effort to legislate away personal responsibility continues unabated, displaying the sort of noise and absence of genuine thought that we’ve come to expect. I’m not quite sure what makes suggesting responsible parenting so much less satisfying than harping about , but after decades of the same ham-fisted approach we may at least be certain of the efficacy of the tactic.